The Worst Music here on Jamendo #2

I love this sort of rubbish, I really do. This reminds me of those 80's b-sides to 7 inch singles by the more "off-kilter" artists of the era. (Think "Teardrop explodes", think "Bauhaus", or if you're too young, think "Lou Barlow" of Sebadoh dragging a broken moog sellotaped to a rusty gate around and around in a concrete courtyard). Yes, these were the days when musicians used to cast aside their artistic shackles, for the duration of a b-side's 5 unbearable minutes and really really.... experiment!!
You swore never listened to listen to those songs ever again, after that first time - but you did. You kept coming back for an occassional spin, to see whether you could have been mistaken. That these misunderstood and largely forgotten tracks were in fact criminally underated works of genius that simply needed time and repeated listening, in order to worm their way into your affections.
But no, you were totally and utterly wrong on that score, these were indeed nuggets of utter shite. Pure jawdroppingly dire wastes of precious minutes of your life.
Ahhh, those were the days. Don't you miss B-sides? Sadly, the thing is, yes you probably do. Life doesn't seem right without them.
So that is why everyone here should download this abysmal, cobbled together old noddy-bag of pointless noodling without any further delay.
My only regret is that I learned of this collection a little too late to be able to contribute some sort of aural smegma to the stew. However, if there is to be a 3rd installment to the series (and there must!!), then there are one or two un-released travesties by "TROLLEY" that have made unsuspecting women passing within earshot, sprout testicles in horror - that I will pass along for consideration.
Awful.
Absolutely fucking awful.
Well done you lot, it's quite brilliant.

MATT (from 'Trolley')

Hey, this could have been a lot worse (better). That said, it really does appeal to my sense of "badness." Some of it is really cool bad, like Gilles Snowcat, sounds like noise I might make at home while drunk and bored on a rainy Saturday afternoon. Other tracks are calculatingly bad. Only a true master like Coke Al-Jose can crank out a horrible car wreck of a tune like Seaside Casino Romance. Then there's bad in the classic sense with Giant Squid March on Washington and The Chadderandom Abyss. Gotta had it to Mudit, too, just for trying. Crazy Musician is trying my nerves right now!

And while I'm on a roll, please bear with me while I plug some of the truly awful artists that have produced some of the biggest musical turds to date: The Exploding Plastic Inedible show by Astro Al live at Goatstock 3: http://www.jamendo.com/en/album/8458 .
If that doesn't make you retch, try GBVO by the Greater Boston Visionary Outpost: http://www.jamendo.com/en/album/4076 . Very strange that some people liked this album, but the one French reviewer got it right! GBVO sucks! If you're just looking for a totally f'ed up sound to completely ruin your evening, you can always try: http://www.jamendo.com/en/album/24844 . To be honest, I don't think that Hello Shark is all that bad, but they do sound almost exactly like this in a live performance. The reviewers were slamming the quality of the recording, but hey, they weren't at the show, so what would they know?

Your's in awfulness,
Randy